Tuesday, May 22, 2007

The tyrants and the victims

I am moving to Denmark.

Why you say? There are about 4500 Danish junta fighting against the "tyranny of early risers"
The number is of course small but here I am pretty much on my own (except may be K who will surely join in)
Read the details here and here.

I have never been a morning person and have always been admonished for it. I missed all my morning classes (god forsaken time of 7am and 8am) throught out my college life. Earliest I can get anywhere without wanting to murder the whole bloody world is may be 9 (in emergencies only) otherwise its got to be 11. I am nocturnal by nature meaning I cannot sleep before 1am unless I haven't slept for 3 days straight so jumping out of bed at 6am is out of question.
I've tried very very very hard to be an early riser but after months of practising I realised I am not half as productive when I wake up early.
But I am not to be sleeping in peace especially because I am a "woman." It used to be "how can a girl sleep so late? It is not lakshana what will you do when you go to your husband's house?" Well I went to my husband's house and slept late. So now I hear "how can a woman of the house sleep so late? It brings bad luck to the house." What about when men sleeping late? Well thats bad too but it doesn't bring bad luck or anything so its alright (I've actually heard this explanation)
And I find no incentive in waking up early other than may be watch sunrise and see some interesting birds. However since I live in Bangalore, picturesque sunrises and interesting birds are not part of the package. So I go on holidays to watch sunrises and bridwatching. Although I am very biased towards sunsets and moon rises.

I don't see a point to this getting up early thing especially after marriage cos all morning I end up in the kitchen making coffee (which I don't drink) and thinking up of and making breakfast while hubby dear checks his "office emails" reads newspaper back to back and suddenly takes off saying "damn its late I'll be stuck in the traffic jam...is there anything for breakfast?"
One of the articles also says that if you are the kind who cannot get up early then choose your professional carefully. Good for me that although late I did make a career change and atleast my boss doesn't call me to ask "why are you late"
I feel obligated to repeat some of the explanations people come up for my not getting up early
"Your husband comes back home late isn't it thats why you can't get up early" (giggle)
"You must be studying for some sorta exams thats why you sleep late and can't get up early"
"Yours is a love marriage so I guess it is ok to get up late" (isn't this priceless?)
"Oh you don't have kids thats why you do this" (!!!)
They don't seem to get the point that I simply don't want to get up early in the morning on most days!!!
Here are some of the motivational onliners people have tried on me
"you can finish off all the work and then go to sleep at around 11" (!!!)
"if you leave the milk outside so late it will get spoiled"
"your husband will feel un motivated to go through the day if he has a wife who sleeps late" (again priceless)
"It is not healthy to keep odd sleeping schedule" (only sensible one and I've not heard it too often)
"Hasn't being a journalist taught you nothing?" (Wha???)
The rest of them aren't funny or interesting so I'll spare you that.
I never grudge other people who get up early (unless they insist on my company) so why grudge me?
Unless people take a cue and let me be I might be moving to Denmark.

5 comments:

Sav said...

"Yours is a love marriage so I guess it is ok to get up late"

huh????

Abhipraya said...

you should've seen her expression when I said "but ours is an arranged marriage" But she recovered quickly and said "it doesn't look like an arranged marriage"

At this point I gave up!

Pavithra said...

as in the traditional wife is expected to wake early, wash hair, wrap in towel, wear crisply starched cotton saree, put kolam, make idlis, grind chutney, and smilingly wake the husband (who has slept through all this!) with a steaming cup of coffee.

haven't you watched the leo coffee ads?!

Abhipraya said...

Yeah but wasn't that ad made in the early 80s? Aren't we supposed to have progressed since then?

Bit Hawk said...

Haha...very hilarious!
Being a late riser myself, I love this Oscar Wilde quote "Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast" :))