Corny existential stuff

I don't usually do these kinds of posts. But then this is my vent space and these days my only vent space. so...

Do you ever get a feeling that you have changed so much that you can't figure out yourself? Well I feel like that these days. (I told you it was corny)

The image, that was me and the new and not necessarily improved me, (post baby) is almost irreconcilable. I can't seem to get a hold of things. The control freak that I am...hate it. Totally abhor it. I was never the fixed routine kind of person anyways. But all impulses and the reaction to it was all mine. These days I just react. And not always nicely. There is no mindspace to think, create, execute outside of Miss T's diet plans. And as much as I love that child, that isn't enough.

I didn't realise how bad it was to not have a career till now. I don't work full time. Worse, I work from home; so I can't claim to be a career woman and I am not your typical homemaker either (no offence to homemakers). I am in my own little trishanku swarga.

And I swear I could do with a LOT less guilt. I am prone to guilt and then there are people to make it worse. There is no getting away from people is there?

I have no clue on the way forward. May be it'll just occur to me in my sleep. Or may be I'll just get used to this.

PHHHHHBBBBRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTT

Must take a break

All I have these days rant, rant and more rant :(

Angry young woman

People / things that make me feel very violent these days

1) Mothers who complain about their husbands' lack of house training but insist on baby sitting their 25 year old sons.

2) Media feigning ignorance on the whole IPL drama while anyone who followed it right from the start would know how rotten it was to start with.

3) Young men acting like little boys who can't pull up their own knickers.

4) Mothers who walk up to other mothers and say you are doing a bad job.

5) People who think it is the easiest thing to work from home.

6) Bad customer service at every turn.

7) Bangalore's development.

8) The thought that Miss T might have to spend her adulthood with no trees and no water for the most part.

9) Schools that charge 2 lakh rupees for a pre-nursery admission and Rs 4500 per month as van fees!

10) The heat. Which I suspect is the main cause for 1-9

Bah!!

Why does it have to be Uterus or the Brains? They are made in a way that both work together and well at that!

#!@$##@!$#@$#@!$#@$@#!#@$